Wednesday, February 25, 2009

Inquring Minds Wanted To Know

Why am I blogging through my sickness?

Well, here's why...

EVEN THOUGH....I totally wish I was better, and could very much do without all of this, the silver lining that I have found through it all is that...

...all the stress and overwhelmingness of my normal day, and the "I-have-too-much-to-do-I'm-never-going-to-get-it-done"....has all been gone. I haven't felt any of it. I can't even have, or form, the thoughts. The headache, the fever, the chills just physically won't let me think of them. The only thoughts I can form in my brain is "take medicine, watch Grey's".

It's actually been quite liberating. I haven't felt stressed at all (except for when I'm frustrated when thinking "I can't do this another day").

And on the "too-much-to-do" days, blogging usually is on the top of my list. But then, as the day goes by, it slowly gets moved lower and lower on the priority list.

I actually enjoy blogging. So, when all of that "other" stuff/responsibility is gone, like during this sickness, I have been able to do a tiny bit of blogging. It felt so good to be able to do what I want to do, without the nagging in the back of my brain saying that I am neglecting other more important things. [I also can't just "go to sleep" like some said, cuz I don't sleep. I just lay there...(Alicia, is that correct English? ) Last night I was lying awake from 10:00 p.m. - 4:00 a.m. going through the routine of shakes and sweats. Feel sorry for me yet? hehehe. I sound like such a whiner.]

AND as much as I am begging, praying and looking forward to getting well, I'm not quite looking forward to "those" days again. I liked the liberating days. (And yes, I know, the Tony Robbins in all of us would say...just MAKE those days happen. But realistically we can't have liberating days without any responsibility all the time)

So I promise...I'm going to stop writing about my stupid sickness (even though I'm going to the doctor today because not much has changed and now my heart is starting to skip a lot) and try blogging about my trip. It really was a great time. Does it seem too long ago to blog about it now?


Alicia said...

As much as I do not wish to be in your shoes right now... I'd love to just sit and watch "Grey's" all day. Oh the drama.
Man, get better already. You are starting to really worry me.

Joannie Pethel said...

Aw we hope you feel better Christy:/